Feel That Fire
by upontheridge
Summary: <html><head></head>How long will I be picking up pieces, how long will I be picking up my heart? Another Jacob/Bella story.</html>


A/N: I do not own the Twilight Series in any way. The only thing I own is my creativity. Some parts in the beginning of this story are going to be taken out of the book, just rewritten in my own words. Lyrics are owned by Muse and Alkaline Trio.

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><p><em>How long will I be picking up pieces?<em>

_How long will I be picking up my heart?_

My head was full of shouting as Leah ran to kill the newborn that was lingering and came out of nowhere.

_Leah Don't!_

I could see his arms move to go around her. More shouting once the rest of the pack realized what I was about to do, but I was too quick to stop. I dug my paws into the ground, running fast and knocking the newborn down. It didn't last for long, he found his stone arms to wrap around my body. I let out a loud yelp in pain, feeling half of my body literally break. I fell to the ground, defeated, and whining out in pain as I tried to get back up. It was a lost cause.

I wasn't aware of what was going on around me, I knew Sam had finished taking care of the newborn. Just my luck to nearly get myself killed when I had decided on my way down to the fight that I couldn't. Of course that had a lot to do with Bella.

My big eyes looked up, and I could see Carlisle. He was speaking quickly and rushed, but I didn't need him to tell me that I had crushed half of my body. I couldn't even focus on anything. Bella was who I wanted to see, was she okay? I was worried Edward would be hard on her. But she had ran over even with me still in my wolf form. Somehow that comforted me.

"I'm here Jake, I'm here," she said down to me, reaching a hand to touch me but she was hesitant and took her hand back.

I wasn't even aware of the others that ran off to phase back to their human forms until I felt nine set of arms lifting me up carefully. I howled out in pain from being moved.

"We'll be back at Billys," Sam had called over to Carlisle.

"I will be there as soon as I can," Carlisle said back. The way his voice sounded it made me wonder for a second what we were missing by having to leave. Then the pain took over my mind completely and that was all I could seem to focus on.

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><p><em>I found away,<em>

_Over the fear and through the flames, I'm diving in._

_Don't follow me, stay right here and I'll be back for you someday._

_I found away, and it'd be best if you just stayed._

"Jacob, you need to try and calm yourself down so you can phase back." They sat me down a little ways from the house, probably because of everyone inside. I let my eyes bore up into them, trying to stop the whining that kept coming out of my muzzle. If only I could shout and tell them it was impossible, and they should try to get half of their body crushed _then _try to phase back just to try it.

But I tried to listen, focusing on getting my mind off of the pain. It took a little while but I was finally able to let the heat work it's way out and my body transform back into my human form. Then I screamed in pain.

"Lets get him inside," Sam mumbled. They all lifted me up again and carried me into my house.

I heard Charlies voice asking what the hell had happened to me, and I knew why they wanted me to phase first before they brought me inside. I caught a glimpse of my dads face which looked torn. But I couldn't say anything. The only thing I knew how to do was yell out profanities.

It seemed like forever after they had laid me down in my bed as carefully as they could for Carlisle to stop by. Then, soon after he had been there, I was cussing at him to leave.

"Jacob, I have to re-break the bones, they've already started to set." He tried to tell me. I just stared up at him, breathing hard.

"The hell," I muttered. But I had no choice.

I must of screamed out every cuss word in my vocabulary as it felt like he was crushing the right side of my body again. After I was wrapped up he attempted some morphine which didn't do anything. He promised to stop by later to set up a drip. I was sure my body temperature would burn that off too.

Sam came in to check on me as soon as Carlisle had left. I saw pain even on his face, and I knew I didn't want to see my dad quite yet.

There was only one thing on my mind, however. "Where's Bella?" I asked, wincing when I realized I couldn't move hardly at all. This was going to be annoying for the next two days it would take me to heal. I grimaced at the thought.

"She called and said she would be over here soon," he answered softly.

I nodded, laying my head back against the pillows. It was driving me crazy. I really hoped Edward was not too hard on her. The thought alone was enough to kill me, him yelling at her or hurting her in any way.

I vaguely remembered the vamp doctor coming back into my room and setting up a drip. He must have had it pouring straight into my system because I was in and out of it. I hated to be thankful in anyway towards him, but at least now the pain was bearable.

When Bella walked into my bedroom I could of swore I felt my heart stop. In a way I hated feeling this way, but it was also the best feeling in the world at the same time. I smiled weakly at her, until I got a good look at her face. She had been crying, that was obvious.

"Bella," I breathed, looking up at her. "Are you okay?"

She let out a small, weak laugh at my comment. "You're asking me if _I'm _okay?"

"I was worried about you...I knew he was probably listening. He wasn't hard on you was he?"

She shook her head fast, sitting down beside the bed on a chair someone had moved in here. "He wasn't even mad at me." And the way she said this made me realize something else.

As I took a few deep breaths and looked up at her. She was always so beautiful in her own way, even now with the redness under her eyes from crying. She continued quickly, and I already knew what was coming. I prepared my heart for the breaking.

"I...I do love you Jake..." She sighed and paused, looking down at me biting her bottom lip. "This can wait," she stated quietly.

I shook my own head once or twice. "I'd rather get all the re-breaking done now."

I could already see the tears starting to form in her eyes, and if I didn't already know what was coming next that would of finished breaking my heart right then and there. I hated to see her hurt, to see her cry. Over anything. I didn't care if she was going to cry over a plant dying, it hurt me to see her like this.

I was hardly conscious listening to her talk, knowing what she was saying, but I didn't want to focus on it. Once the tears started falling from her eyes, I knew it was over. Any chance we ever had was now over.

"At least..." I glanced away from her for a second then back up. "At least I know I did everything I could. I wish that was enough." I gave another weak smile. "I can see what I was doing was ripping you in two, and I won't pull you apart anymore. I promise you that."

She just looked down at me and nodded. "Do you want me to come back to visit you?"

That was something I thought about for a second. Bella was like an addiction to me, and soon, very soon, she would be my enemy. She wouldn't be the girl I fell in love with. I just had to quit her, and I had to do it now. "I'll call you first, I need some time." I finally said softly. "But do know that...I'll always be waiting for you."

Bella was turning to leave the room and she turned back, giving me a small smile. "Until my heart stops beating."

"I love you Bella." I managed to get out before she left the bedroom. I stared after her for a good couple of minutes. It finally hit me, this was quite possibly the last time I would ever see Bella Swan again.

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><p>As soon as I could phase back, I knew what was coming. I had said my goodbyes to my pack and to my father. I knew I couldn't stick around here anymore. I had to get far away from Forks, far away from <em>her.<em> I had to get my mind off of everything. The only way I saw fit of doing this was running. Maybe I could get used to being just a wolf, that would be nice. Not having to think of anything but the basic instincts to survive.

When I took off, I knew I had no intentions on coming back. The pain I felt in my heart was almost unbearable.

_Come back when you're ready, Jake. _Sam thought softly.

I didn't think. I focused very hard on the trees I was already running through.


End file.
